Toasted

On March 9th a Chandler man drove to a nearby Wal-Mart to purchase a fire extinguisher because his toaster oven was on fire. The man set his toaster oven on fire while drying the Methamphetamines he was manufacturing.

The man attempted to douse the flames with water and was unsuccessful. Presumably the 19 year-old did not want to bring the authorities in the matter, as he was whipping up a batch of Meth and also in possession of marijuana.

While the man was absent from his endangered condo the sprinkler system was triggered and stifled the flames. Altering the authorities to the fire, and making him the lucky winner of a fabulous vacation in a concrete cell without a view, courtesy of Maricopa County.

Part of the punishment for crimes like this one should be sterilization. This man shouldn’t be responsible for the care of a Chia Pet let alone a human being.

Tune in Wednesday for a special Cursed Tongue Guide to Surviving a Toaster Oven Fire.